How To Avoid Being Deceived When Meeting Online

The Internet has again crept further into our daily lives with the conception of on line dating. With a couple clicks of a button you can open a whole broad world of people awaiting you, looking for relationships..

Naturally, when meeting people on line your decisions have to be made carefully. The basic awareness and basic rules are recommended, even necessary, to remain safe and to avoid a potentially dangerous situation. The majority of people you meet on line you can be relatively sure they are harmless. However, there are always those among the crowd, which hide their true identity, or completely lie about who they are and what they want of you.

It is very easy to be deceived on line – without being able to see a person face to face it can be hard to judge them. A mistake when meeting people on line or using on line dating sites can have very real consequences, and at the very least allows the misuse of your personal information. Consequently the personal awareness and caution are necessary when meeting people on line. With some simple precautions you can be relatively sure that the people you meet are harmless and by carefully protecting passwords, using username only and not disclosing personal information, you can continue you to appreciate meeting people on line without the risk.

by Dave Stewart


Success of Online Dating

Is there really success being experienced with online dating? What is the success rate of online dating? Can you be successful with online dating?

I am not a success story, let us get that straight right now, but I am here to tell you what people are looking for and why they use online dating. The success of online dating is not different than any other type of dating. You get what you are willing to put into it.

This is how online dating works. You join a dating site and then you meet someone. You read their profile, which is basically an overview of how they view themselves. This will give you an idea of the confidence of the person and some of the basics.

Then, you start chatting or e-mailing this person. Hopefully they are interested too and you start interviewing them. Online dating is great for the beginning because you can ask a lot of questions without feeling awkward. The only problem is you don’t get the body language to go along with the reactions to your questions.

Online dating has proven to be successful and is a great way to meet people, but take caution. Just like with any other type of dating, there are losers, players, married people cheating, and actual romantics. I think that if you are serious about finding your mate you should explore all the options with your best effort.

So if you are going to use online dating, use it successfully. One tip I will give you right off the bat is to be completely honest. If you lie about your appearance, personality, or anything else, you are just setting yourself up to be dumped on. The other person will find out before you ever get anywhere with them.

Be successful with online dating by using caution, honesty, and by being a decent person. This is how you will achieve the success of online dating.
Are you ready to find your soul mate? Do you want to have more success with online dating than you could ever dream of? Then start by joining one our recommended websites.

by Harrison Street

11 Signs Your Date Is Married

You know if you wrecked the truck on purpose because you needed the insurance money to make the next payment, you might be a redneck. At least that’s what Jeff Foxworthy says.

And if your date is up to any of the following, s/he just might be married.

1) If his or her picture isn’t online, but he or she has plenty to send you…he or she might be married.

Yeah, well…maybe he or she is embarrassed to be seen online by co-workers, etc. With online dating becoming more and more mainstream, that excuse is going to be less and less useful.

2) If he or she always has an excuse for not having you over the house…he or she might be married.

Especially guys. If a man does not want women over to his house, it can only mean one of two things: a) He’s married, or… b) …he’s homeless (or at least close).

Now here’s the other side of the coin. Checking out someone’s place is an excellent way to get this whole issued resolved. Unless s/he’s an independently wealthy one with ‘crash pads’ other than the primary residence, you’ll be able to tell PDQ that dude/dudette is single.

3) If he or she can only see you at weird hours…he or she might be married.

Are you being pencilled in for a lot of weekday breakfasts or lunches? A “quick dinner” that ends by 7.30? Saturday afternoon from 1-2.30? OK…you can wake up now.

Bear in mind this point stands only when a blanket statement. If there are weird times in addition to blocks of time during weekends and evenings, that’s probably a good sign.

4) If he or she can only see you for a short while at a time…he or she might be married.

This goes right along with the previous point. If someone likes you, s/he wants to hang around for more than an hour at a time…at least sometimes. Again, some short visits are a good sign…if there are also blocks of time being spent together. 5) If he or she live in a major metro area but are flying around the country/world to meet you…he or she might be married.

This is a good one. A lot of people think that meeting someone online from far away and doing the LDR (i.e. “long distance relationship”) is so romantic. My simple question to you is this: If s/he’s such an incredible gem of a “hottie”, why does this person need to meet people hundreds or thousands of miles away when he or she lives in oh, say, Chicago? I’m thinking that in a metro area of 10m people (or 250K people, for that matter), there’s someone local to date. Granted, God may have put your soulmate far away from you to teach you both discipline, dedication, patience, etc. But through the fog of infatuation, at least consider how virtually foolproof it is for someone who is married to set up trysts in far away places.

Be especially wary when someone from far away has existing business concerns in your city, or could logically. For example, if dude works for a supplier to AT&T out of Oakland, CA, he’s probably coming to San Antonio at some point anyway. It’s way too easy to get away with this for a married person. Even if someone is coming in for the weekend, find out if s/he has some hobby or interest that would have earned a “kitchen pass” with the spouse.

Do the research. Add it up. Go with your gut on this.

BTW, look for the ins and outs of flying somewhere to meet an online friend in a future article.

5) If you can’t get a home phone number out of them…he or she might be married.

With so many people cutting off the landlines in favour of going mobile only these days, this is far from foolproof. But if seen in combo with other factors, take it into consideration.

6) If you’ve seen them driving two different vehicles…he or she might be married.

Example: Guy shows up to your first date with an ’03 Chevy Silverado pickup. Second date, he’s driving an ’01 Honda Odyssey minivan. This is not a good sign. Sorry, troops…single people just don’t tend to own both a pickup truck and a minivan. Or two different Honda Accords. You get my drift. If you call the guy in our example out on this and he says something to the effect of, “Oh, that’s a rental. The truck’s in the shop” take into consideration that a) Rentals are usually less than two model years old,… b) are invariably free of visible damage (even “used” car rentals don’t have smashed fenders,… c) almost always have the rental company’s logo/barcodes on them somewhere., and… d) rentals from dealers/repair shops are typically small econo-boxes or (at best) equivalent to what the customer is driving. The rental excuse will either hold water, or it won’t.

Note, however, that if a guy in particular has two dissimilar vehicles it’s not necessarily a bad sign. Lot’s of guys do. For example, if he has a pickup truck one day and a Porsche the next, that’s not what we are talking about here. Oh…and more single guys have “family” type cars/minivans than you think. That alone isn’t a biggee.

7) If he or she has tan lines on his or her left ring finger…he or she might be married.

Yep, this is the classic stereotype. It’s obvious, but it still deserves mention. People still try to get away with this.

8 ) If he or she is “legally separated”…he or she might be married.

Scratch “might be”…he or she is married. This scenario deserves careful research and lots of questions. Also, be advised that in some states (e.g. here in TX) there isn’t even such a thing as “legal separation”. Being involved with someone who is “separated” may mean the spouse (and that’s what that other person is, frankly) may not exactly feel the same way or be on the same page as your date. Proceed with caution-after all, there’s already an admission going on here that s/he’s married! Guys, this is a good way to get shot at. Think about it.

9) If the divorce “is going to be final any day now”…he or she might be married.

This goes hand-in-hand with the point above…maybe literally. You have an admission from your date that s/he is married, so almost any excuse goes, doesn’t it? For what it’s worth, I really hope that if you are intelligent enough to read English you would never be willing to believe that your date is going to “get around to leaving” his or her spouse sometime “soon”. Please.

10) If he or she just moved here from somewhere else…he or she might be married.

Sure people move all the time, but if there really wasn’t anything to move TO in your city for your date (e.g. job, family ties, etc.) then you should find out what s/he is moving FROM. Caveat emptor…the break-up might not be final back at home.

11) If he or she has to leave when the cell phone rings…he or she might be married.

Oh yeah. Gotta keep the spouse informed…and in this case your date is going to have to lie to everyone at once about it, so that conversation can’t happen in front of you. Logical, isn’t it? This isn’t foolproof, however, especially if your date is on-call for work a lot and deals with potentially sensitive info (e.g. doctor, lawyer, law-enforcement). You make the “call” on this one.

by Scot McKay

How to be Successful at Online Dating

With such a fast-paced world, dating has been set to the next level. But no matter how quick you convert chats and private messaging into real life dates, online relationships can absolutely turn into something steady and serious.

If you are ready to plunge into the world of online dating, here are some tips to make you successful in your feat:

Work on Your Profile
If someone were looking for a date online, whether through chat or » Female Dating, your profile would be the first thing that he or she would check out. Avoid writing about negative things in your profile – a positive aura always attracts people in a good way. Be creative and clever in creating your profile. Also, try to comparing yourself with someone famous or a movie character so as to paint a picture of your personality.

Picture Perfect
Try to post your best picture. Posting pictures of cartoon characters or celebrities instead of your own can give the impression that you are trying to be someone that you are not.

Don’t Rush Things
Don’t arrange for a meet-up right away. Take time to get to know your would-be date either on chat or through private messaging (a week or so would do). If you can, get his/her mobile number so that you can call or text them whenever either of you goes offline. Your previous conversations with them can make things easier when you decide to go out on a real date.

Be Consistent
There are some people that you share a good first conversation with. The key to honing an online relationship is constant communication. See to it that you send a message to your someone on a regular basis. Remember that there are probably hundreds of other people that he/she is chatting with, so make a move to let him/her know you’re still interested!

Although dating in the online world is in such a hurried state, you should not be. Take time to get to know a person and share something about you as well. If you both hit it off on the internet, chances are you may be compatible offline as well. Now that’s something to look forward to.

by Ron Zvagelsky

Overcoming Shyness on Your Date

Overcoming shyness may be a challenging feat especially if you were naturally shy as a kid or as a teenager. Although you can never really overcome shyness completely, you can at least minimize it. Here are some quick tips on how you can do so:

A Strong Visual Image
Most people tend to be shy when they are unsure of what to do or what to say in a given situation. The solution is to simply prepare for it. Visualize in your mind what you think is likely to happen on your date and prepare for the things you should say or do.

Be Interesting
Being an interesting person isn’t really something you can do over night. What you need to do is get involved with your community, join organizations, do better at work, or get yourself a good hobby. The rationale is that if you find something interesting to talk about yourself, which you can be highly proud of, then that would give you more confidence to go out there and consequently overcome your shyness.

Make Eye Contact
Wandering eyes can mean uneasiness and shyness. It may seem hard at first but you really need to establish eye contact with the person you are talking with. As a timid person, the first few minutes may seem awkward for you – but you will eventually feel comfortable as the minutes pass by. If you are talking, grinning and meeting a person’s eye after a couple of minutes – congratulations, you are effectively overcoming your shyness.

Be Yourself
Some people have a misconception about alcohol and overcoming shyness. Don’t try to get drunk thinking that it is the only way to overcome your shyness – it usually does more harm than good. Always be yourself and try to reveal your personality to the person you are dating. If you are a naturally shy person, then so be it – it’s better than pretending to be someone you are not. It is always rewarding to know a person likes you entirely for who you are, shy or not.

by Ron Zvagelsky

5 Online Dating Safety Tips

Online dating is an excellent way to meet people as long as it is done safely. Before you begin chatting with those strangers on the other line, make sure to take a few minutes to make sure that you know what you should and shouldn’t be doing. Like any type of dating, it is important to realize that you do not know the other person on the other side of the instant message. In fact, the online dating game makes it even harder to know who is out there. Here are some simple, effective ways for knowing how to stay safe during online dating.

Tip One: Never give out personal information. One of the most vulnerable ways that this can happen is simply telling someone your credit card number, your online passwords, or your social security number. If they want to buy something for you, or need to borrow some money, run. Even if you have talked to them for years, you should never provide this information on the web. Instead, send them a money order or make the purchase yourself.

Tip Two: Beware of people who lie to you. Now, this may seem quite simple as no one wants to be around those that lie. But, in the online dating game, you really need to watch for those mistakes. As they found you, they can find others. In other words, don’t think that you are the only one that they are chatting with. One thing the online dating world is not is exclusive. Lying can be a sign that they are keeping things from you that are much larger. Be wary of this.

Tip Three: Don’t provide your home address to anyone. Again, you do not really know these people nor do you want some nut case showing up at your house. Don’t think they will do that? Ask yourself why they wouldn’t. Never provide your last name either if you information is listed in phone books or the web. Just make one up or simply don’t give one out. Having a name, phone number and address of an individual is enough to get some loans.

Tip Four: If you plan to meet them, meet them in an open, crowded place and stay there. Your first meeting should be someplace like a restaurant, a park or a movie theater where there are many people around for your own safety. Also, don’t stray from that location. On a first date like this, you shouldn’t trust anyone.

Tip Five: When you are participating in online dating, you need to properly prepare yourself. Many of the people that get on the web to find someone to talk to are just fine, but there are those that are looking at you as if you are prey. Not only do you need to protect your safety, but you also need to protect your heart.
Don’t put it on the line. Make sure your just looking for friends at first. If by that slim chance you do find someone to love, that’s great. But protecting yourself first and foremost is your goal in every online dating relationship that you enter.

by Bruce Morris

How to Write a Magnetic Online Personal Profile

online datingWant to succeed in online dating? Your personal profile (or dating profile) may well be the difference between success and failure. Why?

Well, online, you are what you write. Your personal ad is your first introduction to the person you want to meet.

You see, during face to face communication other aspects such as body language, choice of clothing, individual scent, body language, poise etc. all come to play. While extremely few people (if any) are strong in all the aspects, your one or two strong areas might be so endearing that the other person might forgive or not even notice the weaknesses.

But in online dating all you have is your profile. Lose here and lose all.

Not only that but writing your profile does other positive things to you like:

1. Makes you admit that you do need to find a date.

2. Forces you to look deeper into yourself and get to know the real you.

3. Allows you to be specific about the kind of person you are looking for, beyond the basics.

I cannot overemphasize the importance of a winning personal profile, especially for the single person seeking a serious relationship.

Now, get pen and paper ready, get comfortable. You are going to take a few notes that will make your personal profile talk for you. We begin with the skeleton.

There are three key points to writing an appealing personal profile:

1. Know what you want

2. Know yourself

3. Know the type of person you want

Let’s break each of these down farther:

1. Know what you want: think about what you are looking for such as:
• A serious relationship
• Casual relationship
• A date
• Marriage
• A discreet partner
• An escort
• A companion
• A friend, pen pal, or e-pal
• Experimentation

Other things that it might help think of are:
• Kids or no kids (now or in future)
• Commitment
• Your sexual orientation/preference
• Age range
• Race, if it’s an issue
• Religion, if this is important to you
• Geographical proximity
• Educational background if that’s important to you

Write it down.

2. Know yourself- Apart from the generic information such as your age, height and weight, you will need to know your qualities, assets and liabilities as well as hobbies, likes and dislikes. Think about:

a. Your assets: Some things to think about are:
• Sense of humor
• Romantic
• Confident
• Sociable
• Honest
• Intelligent
• Ready for commitment
• Compassionate
• Open-minded
• Intelligent

The above are just examples, and don’t even scrape the surface. Let your mind run. Write down everything, however trivial or ridiculous.

b. Your liabilities: these may just be opposites of assets (above) or more. List these down. Here are some examples:
• Greedy
• Cheap
• Jealous (not always a bad thing)
• Afraid of commitment
• Depressive
• Prejudiced
• Substance abuse or history of
• Bossy
• Hard to live with
• Nagger

Other things to think about:
• What are your strengths?
• What are your weaknesses?
• What do you like to do in your spare time?
• Where do you like to go in your spare time?
• What do your friends like about you?
• What does your mom love about you?
• If you were to change one thing about you, what would that be?
• What type of relationship do you seek?
• What are your likes/dislikes?
• What makes you good company?

3. The type of person you want: This may appear easy, but surprisingly most singles do not know what they are looking for beyond the basics.

Now, try to go beyond physical attributes and get into the soul of the person you want. Think of qualities you would like, just as you thought of your own. Also remember that similarities as well as differences do make good matches (a talkative person might match well with a quiet one, for example).

Now you have most of the basics of writing your personal profile covered. Plus, you now can provide answers to profile questions on any dating site without struggling too much.

The next step is writing your personal ad. This is the heart of your personal profile.

When writing your personal ad, remember that you are selling yourself. Emphasize on the positive, but a negative well blended into the ad might work as well, even make your ad stand out (“I may not have the body of a supermodel but…”).

But first your photo: hugely important. Why? Because it is the first thing other people will look at before deciding to read farther. Also, the number responses increase dramatically when you post a photo.

The photo should be fairly recent and of yourself (not your cute cousin’s). It should be cast you in positive light, but not overdone. And please do not post a suggestive photo on a serious dating or matchmaking site (it will not be published anyway).

Also of importance is your screen name. Prospects will look at this before deciding to whether to read any farther. Make this short, catchy and descriptive. Avoid over-used terms such as “cuteandsexy42”.

While creating a screen name, it might help to zero-in on who you are and what you like to do (For example, “petiteblueeyez32” tells something about looks and age).

Next you will begin to write your personal ad. Start with a good headline: yet another hurdle to get over. Your headline should be short, descriptive, and easy to remember. Study other peoples’ headlines and see which ones attract you.

Writing: A conversation-style writing works best for a personal profile. Use imagination. See your ideal woman/man as though seating right there in front of you. Tell her/him why she/he would want to be with you.

Say what you like to do and what makes you exciting. Get excited. Write without worrying about spelling, grammar or length. At this point you’re trying to get your emotions on paper (or typing document), and stopping to make corrections only interrupts the flow.

Describe yourself. Say what makes you special. What you bring into a relationship. Your interests, hobbies, what makes you good company, what you bring into the relationship. Pour your heart out. And use action words. Give them something to make them remember your ad.

There are things you should avoid. Among them trite, canned expressions and overused clichιs. I can’t bear to read another “looking for my knight in shinning armor” type of personal ad. Neither can you, I presume.

Study other peoples’ personal profiles. If an ad catches your eye attempt to find out what makes it interesting. Model yours on these, but please don’t copy directly. Take your time and do it right.

Be honest. Be sincere. Don’t exaggerate and don’t fake. Above all, don’t lie.

When you are done writing, take a break. Let the draft seat for a while (even a day or two). Then come back with a fresh mind and begin editing. Make corrections on spelling and grammar. Cut clutter. All you will have to do now is transfer your personal profile on to the dating site of choice.

by David Kama